Hope is not something you and I were meant to hold on to until better times showed up. Hope isn’t the ultimate healer of all of our problems. Hope is a state of mind, a worldview, an attitude that transcends how we look back at the past and how we encounter the present. As you and I approach our unique futures, hope is not intended to be the automatic antidote for all things problematic.
In the past few days, a very large robin has been camping out in the maple tree outside my office window. It is apparent to me the robin is a “she” and with another companion, the two robins are building a nest in my tree. I am assuming that soon, eggs will be laid. At some future time, baby robins will hatch from the eggs that will shortly populate the now empty nest.
Usually in the “wild” animal kingdom or the nest building of various species of birds or in the blooming of all sorts of flowers, tree, and shrubs, new life just happens. There is no fixing up a room to be the new nursery, no buying new baby clothes, no purchase of the latest generation of strollers and other gear for the robin outside my window. Just a simple nest and eggs. If everything goes well, in 12-14 days, a new baby robin will break through its shell and it will begin its new life. No time for hope, no time to think about the future – just the present tense activity of building a nest, preparing for birth, laying eggs, tending the eggs and supplying food until the baby robin gets up and flies away.
Instinct, not hope, guides this whole process.
The other day, as I was enjoying my Caramel Café Macchiato, I eavesdropped on a conversation between two folks at my local Starbucks.
Person One – “I hope Heather finds the right the dress for the prom.”
Person Two – “Well at least Heather has been asked to the prom. Ashley doesn’t have a date yet. She has given up hope being asked by Thad. He asked Ashley’s friend, Samantha. I don’t know what I will say to Ash if she doesn’t get asked by someone. What will I do? I just hope the right words come to me.”
Person One – “I hope you do find the right words to help Ashley cope. I don’t know what I would do if I were in your place. I hope I never have to experience your disappointment.”
The conversation went on, with liberal use of the word HOPE being made. It was if some mysterious force called HOPE would make everything turn out so that “they all lived happily ever after.”
Hope, or at least appealing to the power of hope, has replaced actually planning for, executing, and reaping the benefits of our desired outcomes. We believe ourselves entitled to good outcomes, good relationships, good jobs, great vacations, wonderful and inspiring endings to all our life’s wants and needs. We are disappointed when hope doesn’t deliver the promised outcomes we expected.
Hope is not a 30 second commercial that promises to fix our leaky basements. Hope is rooted in a belief in some purpose, some notion that transcends this particular lifespan. Hope is not a process of wish fulfillment.
In a recent discussion of hope, someone in one of my study classes said, “You are born and you immediately start dying.” The guy who offered that maxim didn’t realize how true his statement was. He may actually believe the words he spoke but I doubt it. I doubt it because he loves to eat good food, listen to opera, laugh loud and long, help out at church, is always available to folks in need, and is a fine husband, father, and friend. He enjoys life way too much to be bogged down in the sentiment he expressed in class.
He has found hope in living his life based on an his active, positive response to mortality. He smiles continuously, he perseveres in the tasks he undertakes, he never ceases to add to his understanding of people and his appreciation of life. Each day, he finds great happiness because the hope he knows is built upon a foundation of believing in endless possibilities and endless strategies for living. Some greater power guides him – not random hope in some future reward.
As a person of faith who believes in the promises of eternal life, my friend is not content to wait till he dies to collect all the goodness, happiness, and hope he knows waits for him. He lives in the here and now because of hope, because of joy, because he chooses happiness. He could choose otherwise – he has reasons to do so. But he chooses life affirming living.
Let me remind you, a life of endless hope was yours the moment you were born. It follows you even today. It will be yours at the end of this life. It will follow you in whatever comes after your life on earth ceases. Don’t waste a moment more in claiming the happiness and sense of purpose waiting for you as you allow yourself to be guided by the power and promise of hope.
Magnificent piece of writing. Terrific examples–from the robin eggs to the prom dress to the class member. You are so correct about hope being far more than 30-second commercial. It is more powerful than blowing out candles of a birthday cake. If only that mother could get past herself and the dress and help her daughter understand that disappointment doesn’t need to break your spirit.
This post was written to “exorcise” a broken spirit. I came upon a FB entry from a former church member who seemed so lost and unable to move on from a tragedy that befell her family, it broke my heart. I hope it will help in the healing. Besides the one specific person to whom I addressed this post, I am hopeful that the response you wrote means my post might also speak to others. I just want to let folks know they are not alone in life. There will always be a sunrise and hence a new day in which one’s spirit might flourish. Thanks.
I felt this post was especially gripping. The balance and pace with the mix of narrative and philosophy kept me reading – and thinking. So true, and a new perspective on hope that I need to spend some time on. (Couldn’t click the like button – asked for my wordpress.com log in info)
Thank you Marilyn for your comment and kind feedback. I will check on the glitch you mentioned. I am gratified by the responses to this post I have received. We should never neglect offering ourselves to others in need.