It’s time I offered something practical for you to try. Up to this point, many of my blog posts have offered you, my readers, unsolicited groupings of words. Sometimes those words did help or comfort or confuse, but of what use were they really? So it’s time to offer you some intentionally formed words to ponder.
In their book, Bearing Fruit: Ministry With Real Results, (Lovett H. Weems and Tom Berlin) one of the premises was that two important words the authors knew were “so that.” The authors suggested by adding this two word phrase at the end of a statement of intent, interesting possibilities arose. Even though the book is about ministry, I have found that the process of asking “SO THAT” works with just about any occupation or attempt at self-understanding. Do not be put off by the title of the book. Sometimes we learn from the least expected sources.
As you know, I believe every life should have a noble purpose. Just how one discovers one’s purpose can be an anxious process. But I have an exercise you can use to discover purpose. The only thing I ask is that you stay with the process I am about to suggest until your purpose is clear or you admit to yourself you have no idea of what your purpose may be. It won’t take long.
First, think of something you do everyday. As a way of guiding you, I will lead you through my answers as an example of the process. So let’s begin. I say to myself – “I guess I will wake up and get out of bed.” Now I add “so that” to the end of my statement forming a question I will have to answer, i.e “I guess I will wake up and get out of bed SO THAT I can go to work SO THAT I will get paid SO THAT I can provide for my family SO THAT…
At some point I will discover my purpose for getting out of bed that morning. Or I may prematurely stop the questions and say “who cares.”
And what a waste of time to spend time doing something you don’t care about.
As an alternative to “SO THAT,” assuming you are interested in discovering your purpose as you go through the motions of your life, you can also ask the question “WHY?” For instance, “I guess I will wake up and get out of bed.” WHY? “Because I want to feel useful.” WHY? To me, this isn’t as satisfying as “SO THAT.”
At a minimum, if you stick with the SO THAT exercise you will begin to discover why you do certain things and what things you value. The purpose of this exercise is to reach a point in which you know/can identify your purpose.
Let me suggest some statements you might use as you begin the SO THAT process. I’ll begin with “no muss, no fuss” statements and move towards some statements that may be a bigger challenge. Have fun with this. I’d really like to hear how it goes for you.
I just fed my dog/cat so that…..
I intentionally used my turn signals while driving today so that….
I need to apologize to my wife/husband/partner/co-worker/boss so that….
I have to find a way to be more compassionate so that….
Conquering my greatest fear is next on my list so that…
I want to discover my purpose in life so that….
One last suggestion – do this with another person. Let them supply the phrase SO THAT, so that you actually have a conversation with someone.
OR
Write down your statement and all the subsequent SO THAT answers, so that you can review them later on.
OR
Most frightening of all, do this exercise standing in front of a mirror, so that you can see when you are being too easy on yourself.
Have fun. Please let me know what you learned or experienced.
“So that” does provide a good framework to hang one’s sense of purpose on, not only on a daily basis, but also while forward thinking. I appreciate your providing such a simple, but important framework.
Thanks again. As I suggest, life is too short to waste it on items/issues that do not advance the common good or help an individual grow in self-awareness. You are a loyal and helpful reader. I appreciate your feedback.