Category: Spirituality and Religion

Planning the Day

“I arise in the morning torn between a desire to improve the world and a desire to enjoy the world. This makes it hard to plan the day.” E.B. White

I prefer a third option – my desire is to experience the world. I am too old to think much about improving the world. I don ‘t have many years left. Improving the world is a young person’s activity. Young people (anyone under 40 years old) still believe in their ability to plan a world according to the basic tenets of humankind – good and evil. I remain hopeful that good will triumph, but looking at our planet’s history of attempts at goodness I am not encouraged. Good intentions and hope-filled actions are almost always interrupted by darker forces – war, poverty, injustice, greed, pettiness, etc. Can you think of any time when good triumphed? As a Christian, I was brought up to believe that when Jesus comes back, goodness will reign supreme for eternity. But that hasn’t happened yet. Jesus’ last foray into sharing goodness with folks didn’t end so well so I have some doubts that the next time might end differently.

And one has to be completely immune to the news to believe one can enjoy the world. We are constantly bombarded with endless news cycles laying out for us the pain and suffering, the nihilism, the selfishness, and misunderstanding among folks who don’t seem to be enjoying each other’s company. It’s not just rich v poor, republican v democrat, all the common binary choices we are given to consider. It is the fundamental theme, I believe that you and I cannot enjoy the world because no one seems to know how to enjoy anything these days. The pandemic of 2020 makes enjoyment that much tougher. And these days, if I am caught enjoying most anything I am called horrible names describing my lack of understanding of, and compassion for, the oppression and marginalization of so many categories of people and situations. I am asked how I can enjoy the world when so many are suffering, are kept down, are disregarded, not seen as mattering.

So I am choosing all that’s left for me. I am choosing to experience the world. I choose to take in all that my senses can stand. I choose to engage fully with all points of view, reserving judgment, and condemnation as someone else’s right to decide. I choose to experience and observe everything around me. Some days there is horror, some days utter beauty and simplicity. Some days people are remarkably good, some days they turn on each other with venomous actions.

I am rejecting binary choices – good/bad, rich/poor, matters/doesn’t matter, useful/wasteful. No more drama, no more judgment, just jumping in to experience the world and wonder how it all fits together. You see when I am experiencing the world rather than improving or enjoying it, I get to choose the standards, the values, the definitions I use to describe what I experience in the world. I get to filter everything I experience through the lenses of the things I hold dear.

My filters are these: hope, noble purpose, compassion, easing suffering, giving, beauty, truth, justice, and several others close to my heart. So whatever the news I read or see or hear, I filter it through those virtues. Suddenly I find hope, I see folks doing kind, noble things for others, I see goodness in all that I experience. This is my choice – to experience the world through my values. That’s my plan.

A side benefit is that I find myself praying for the world to be touched by folks bent on improving it and I am encouraged by those who are finding they can enjoy the world. Me, I just experience the world according to what I hold dear. I try to live by three simple maxims paraphrased from John Wesley: do no harm, do all the good you can, find occasions to thank the world for not giving up on me, on us. That’s my plan for tomorrow. Have a great week, improving, enjoying, or experiencing the world. Find your own peace of mind.

Where Are You Running?

“All men should strive to learn before they die what they are running from, and to, and why.” James Thurber

As you know the tag line of my blog is “Every life should have a noble purpose.” How we find that purpose and then act accordingly is one of the keys to a fulfilling time on earth. So many of us, myself included, just go along with whatever comes our way. We allow ourselves to be directed by all sorts of people and events who shape our destiny.

It is the lucky person who realizes, regardless of what others want for our lives, we are ultimately the one who decides our fate. We learn to adapt and improvise, to overcome and flourish in life. No one knows what waits around the bend. No one should linger too long in any situation that does not affirm and nurture one’s sense of self and one’s noble purpose.

How do we decide our path?

We are the sum of all the things we value. One person values honesty and integrity, another self-interest, and control. These values, most probably, will lead to different purposes and actions. So the first question to ask yourself is – what do you value? Look for values that will form the foundation of your being. Study those you admire – read biographies and autobiographies to uncover the values and traits of those folks in whom you see a noble purpose.

Second, how do you transfer your values and purposes into meaningful actions? Do you commit your whole life to serve others, to lessen the suffering of others? What are you determined to do with your life? For what do you want to be remembered? What’s your five-year or ten-year plan? What is your measurement of “success”?

Finally, answer these three “guides”: what are you running from? What are you running to, and why are you running at all? My answers to these questions are: I am running from selfishness and a life without compassion for others. Second, I am running to that place where I can understand and use all my talents to ease the suffering of others. And third, I am running because I believe every life should have a noble purpose – a purpose that demonstrates the power and promise of hope. My purpose is to spread hope into the lives of all those I meet.

Surround yourself with people you admire. Learn about them, question them, listen to their stories of hope, and finding purpose. We are all great teachers and we are all potential students. Teach and learn. A rough paraphrase of the words of one who I admire is this – preach faith until you find your faith. So, decide what you value and then go at it until that value-laden life is yours.

How will you know if you have succeeded? That’s what a heart is for. Be to others what you most want to be for yourself. We all start at the same place and we end at the same place. Develop your hope in the time you have between those two markers.

Giving In To Melancholy

 

Giving In to Melancholy

Blame it on the rain, the first appearance of frost, the cold descent into winter.  No matter how I try to fight it, I can’t shake the feeling that my time is slowly slipping away.  Seasons come and go, cycle after cycle.  It seems I have no other path to travel but to wander back in my mind to summers that have come and gone.

I am trying to grasp hold of the comfortable and comforting.  The past is the place where I find memories of when the future seemed exciting and so full of hope.  But the past is not always helpful.

Certainly, I have great memories, but they are just memories, I can’t touch them even though they can touch me.  The only place I can grasp hold of hope is in the future.  That’s where I am heading this morning.

I wonder what I am hoping to find as I start this too familiar journey of introspection.  I hope for a sense that the days ahead of me are full of life.  My seventy-year-old body forces me to make exceptions and compromises.  I hope I can fully embrace that challenge.  My mind is, however, operating like that of an innocent twenty-year-old-full of hope but short of wisdom.

I hope to make new friends this time around.  I also hope to re-kindle conversation with old friends and to offer words of hope and encouragement to those who are seeking their own meaning and hope.  The trouble with retirement and with my limited mobility is that I am compelled to develop new habits, new expectations, new meaning.  I don’t know how eager I am to go through this.

I meet on Tuesdays and Wednesdays with two groups of folks who are my sounding board and my affirmation.  They challenge me in ways which they may not be aware of.  Their insights and observations touch me at a deep, personal level, all of which I do not fully share or for which I seldom offer adequate thanks to these special folks.  Each one of them holds a special place in my heart and in my private thoughts.

One thing I hope for is the courage to share my thanks with these folks.  Too often I am cavalier and selfish with my thanks.  They deserve more.  Friends, old and new, deserve better.

As I go forward, I hope for the strength to share and the compassion to give back what I have received from these friends of mine.  I miss them when I cannot be with them.  I will miss them when we move south.

Tuesday and Wednesday are coming once again.  Here’s my chance to be the kind of friend to those folks that they have been for me.  Maybe that’s where I will find warmth in the winter fast approaching.  Here is my tangible source of hope.

Robert Louis Stevenson said, “To be what we are, and to become what we are capable of becoming, is the only end of life.”  I am grateful for all those who open up doors of understanding,  guiding me to become what I may be capable of.

I hope I can return the favor.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Never Hope Alone

 

NEVER HOPE ALONE

I have been paying attention lately, listening for the pronouns folks use when they talk about hope.  By far, the pronoun I hear most often is “I”.  As a result, I have begun to wonder if hope is a solitary endeavor, something one covets for oneself.

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Hope Never Disappoints Us

 

But that’s not all!  We gladly suffer, because we know suffering helps us to endure.  And endurance builds character, which gives us a hope that will never disappoint us… (Romans 5:3-4 CEV).

 

Hope never disappoints.

This is a very bold statement.  I would guess many of you would question never having been disappointed by trusting in hope.  And who gladly suffers?  What’s the lesson to be learned from this piece of scripture?

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Eating Without Hope

Eating Without Hope

 

“To eat bread without hope is still slowly to starve to death.”  Pearl S. Buck

Dieting is eating but it isn’t what I would define as eating to live.  Having lived in New Orleans for several years, I experienced what it meant to eat and to live.  Meals were savored, not rushed.  Lingering over each bite of food while commenting on the flavors and aromas made eating so much more than just consuming food.

Eating in New Orleans was a social occasion.  Good friends seated at a table sharing food, conversation and a bit of their respective lives.  Food and drink were to be thoroughly enjoyed while you examined where you were in your relationships and where you might be going in your life as each day unfolded.

Food tasted better while eating with friends and colleagues.  Each bite added to the sum of the experience known as lunch or dinner or a late night treat.  Good friends, good food, good memories helped us to drift towards a sense of hope in our lives.

The hope we felt after sharing a meal was the hope born from being comfortable in the world, satisfied with our friendships, and literally full of nourishment.  Hope seemed like a noble purpose to pursue, a reason to thrive.  It resulted from the comfort of food, fellowship, conversation, and an awareness of living a full life, taking in all the tastes, all the flavors, all the textures and all the moments of calm relaxation.  This was eating with hope, of being alive.

Yet there are many examples in the world of people eating without a sense of hope.  And this taste of hope, while eating, is a form of starving – starving to death.

Standing in line, waiting for food, waiting to eat, waiting without a sense of hope, this is the starvation of which Pearl Buck speaks.  You and I can quickly look up the statistics for those in the world who are hungry or malnourished.  We can even go a step further and support organizations that seek to feed the hungry.  But have we found a way to share the hope that might go along with a hot meal, any meal?  Can we be present at tables where hope isn’t realized?

What about those who are alone at mealtime?  What are we doing for them to offer them hope in their aloneness?  What about the elderly, those confined to institutions and nursing homes?  Is hope their companion at dinner?  Or are they starving to death too?

“Every life should have a noble purpose.”  What could be nobler than sharing hope and a meal with someone who might otherwise be eating, yet still be starving?

 

 

 

 

In The End Good Wins

In the End Good Wins

“What an Outstanding Guy”

It is true that at some level we all want to believe that “in the end good wins.”  I was reminded of this life lesson during one particular funeral at which I served as officiant.

Since that service was for a person who I did not know well, I asked several family members to add their comments to my more general comments.  There was some unease about which family members would participate in offering words of remembrance.

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Core Values Part Two

Core Values Part Two

Knowing our personal core values helps us define our goals in life and as I suggested in Part One, affects what we hope to pass along to the next generation.  Just as importantly, recognizing our core values can help us discern if we are living in such a way as to pursue some great vision, some noble purpose.

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Core Values Part One

 

Core Values Part One

Not long ago I asked the members of a writing group to which I belong if they would share their thoughts concerning basic values.  I asked them what value they would want to pass on to the next generation.  Here are some of the responses I received.

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Living by Fear Living by Faith

In an effort to expand my abilities as a life coach, I am currently taking several continuing education courses.  One particular lecture has me thinking.  Do I live by fear or do I live by faith?

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